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All Saint’s, All Excuses

My favorite flower guy

Where did all of my promises of updating more frequently get me? Where? Where I ask you? Nowhere. I don’t know what my deal is. I’ve heard that lots of long-time bloggers (or as we were once called, online diarists/dinosaurs) go through weird periods of non-blogging. I suspect it comes down to a question of the perfect reader: the best writers always have to figure out their ideal reader and once they figure it out, they have it made. Sofia Coppolla (see, I’m totally obsessed) basically makes movies for her friends. I don’t know who I write for anymore. That’s probably why the other thing I’m doing has kind of stalled. Oh, it’s still in my head, in that I’m kind of always in that world even when I’m on conference calls or making impossibly elaborate spreadsheet efficiency tools (oh my god, sometimes I can’t believe my life has come down to being irritated that Excel only allows for three colors in conditional formatting but seriously, Microsoft, give a girl a break), I’m still thinking about sharks and contagious brain disorders and hippies. But when it comes to making words fill up a white box on a computer, frozen. Frozen. I miss my ideal reader.

Here are some things I could write this entry about:

  • Fall. You guys love the fall stuff. I love the fall stuff. There was just a whole lot of fall stuff that happened, and it was all so beautiful that it felt like the biggest sin ever to do anything other than drive around the countryside with our mouths agape, just soaking in all of the gorgeous leafy goodness.
  • Rehab. This really needs its own entry, because damn, y’all. Damn. You can read about Trance Jen’s experience over on her site, and I think everyone else is playing their cards close to the vest. Apparently we’re feeling a bit protective of our dorky little fun weekends these days and figure that if you wanted to know, you’d get off your ass and go. Maybe that’s just me (because man, am I a bitch). Also, I think everyone now has a crush on Minneapolis.
  • My inherent and sometimes ill-advised blind faith in technology: Iowa. That’s all I can really say right now is that I almost ended up in Iowa before I realized that my GPS had been possessed by Satan. IOWA.
  • My gut has issues and hurts sometimes. I’m probably not dying.
  • Consequently, I’m losing weight, or so I’ve been assured by June, who is probably just trying to make me feel better about looking like I constantly have a gut ache.
  • My job. Wait, I don’t talk about that here. Ever. EVER.
  • My hatred of Old Navy and why I keep going back like the crack whore that I am for cheap sweaters.

Instead, here’s what I AM going to talk about:

Ladies and Gentlemen, I know that I wasn’t sure if there was going to be a Weetacon 2010 after my little unplanned sabbatical from work, but it’s now official: Weetacon 2010 will be held on March 5-7, 2010. There’s lots of information here and we’ll be holding conference calls to cover questions and concerns that newcomers may have regarding Weetacon (or really, so that you can get to know a few people on the phone first before you decide if you really want to hang out with us all weekend).  Also, we have a theme and a subtitle for this year’s event: Technology and L33tacon! We’ll be celebrating everything that brings us together, and also, hopefully learning a few things or five along the way. It’s not all binge drinking, despite what the photos would lead you to believe.

Also, it’s November 1st, which means a very special thing near and dear to many readers of this site. Yes, that’s right, it’s Holiday Card Exchange time!

Can I get a woo woo?

So, here’s the drill on the Holiday Card Exchange: We have a little collective of Holiday Card Enthusiasts who like to send and receive cards at the end of each year, so many that we have split up into two groups so that people could decide whether they wanted to send/receive to only half the list or do the Full Monty. If you want to play along, you fill out this form with your information before November 20th, and then you wait for me to send you the final list. Then you get busy writing and sealing and stamping your cards (the number of which will be dependent upon how many people sign up in total and whether you’ve agreed to do one exchange or both. Each exchange will be no more than 40 people total and since you can add, you know that if you opted to do both exchanges, you’d be sending/receiving 78 cards, since you wouldn’t send two cards to yourself). Any questions? Hit me up in the comments!

In other news, I really have to get this site situated. It’s been like four months since the Russian hackers kicked me in the pants, it’s probably time for this site to put its big boy pants back on.

Until then, I will leave you with one of the Rehab party questions, to answer in the comments:

Which would you rather have, a butler, a maid or a chauffeur?

And why. Don’t forget the why. You’d think it was a simple question, but man, it’s more emotional than you would ever believe.

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19 Comments

  1. Col_in_NY wrote:

    I’d love to play along at home and do the card exchange! Again! Yay! (Note: you might want to add a link to aforementioned card exchange registration form … please? :)

    Sunday, November 1, 2009 at 8:24 pm | Permalink
  2. Angi Iggy wrote:

    I would want a chauffeur. It’s an easy question for me, I can cook and clean but I cannot drive because I have Epilepsy and currently, uncontrolled seizures. So I literally have to beg for a ride whenever I want or need to go anywhere. I’m 33. It’s really bizarre how not being able to just get in my car and go for a ride, can impact my life. I miss driving on a moonlit summer night with the moonroof cranked open with the stereo blaring and singing at the top of my lungs, the most of all. Definitely, chauffeur.

    Sunday, November 1, 2009 at 10:10 pm | Permalink
  3. Mary wrote:

    Can I have a cook? Please?

    Sunday, November 1, 2009 at 10:13 pm | Permalink
  4. gwen wrote:

    Oh, a maid. My kingdom for a maid. My boyfriend and my own dislike of serious deep cleaning — well, who am I kidding… any kind of cleaning — means our apartment has cobwebs on the ceiling and a sticky kitchen floor pretty much all the time. We’re good about laundry and dishes and anything that could attract bugs, but I would lie down and weep tears of joy for a maid who would sweep and dust and mop.

    Sunday, November 1, 2009 at 10:18 pm | Permalink
  5. Amy wrote:

    Can I say cleaning lady instead of maid? I like to do the cooking and laundry but I loathe cleaning and need help with that.

    Also, I am so sad that I missed you during rehab. Any other weekend would have been better for my schedule but for some reason, that particular weekend was packed with family/work/church stuff. Glad you had fun and hope you enjoyed your surprise MN gift basket. At least I could welcome you in that way. :-)

    Monday, November 2, 2009 at 9:24 am | Permalink
  6. Shawna wrote:

    I don’t know what a butler does but if a maid cleans then man, do I need me one of those! Two little kids, a full-time job, a part-time job and a small business leaves me precious little time to clean, even if I had the inherent inclination, WHICH I DON’T!

    Monday, November 2, 2009 at 9:39 am | Permalink
  7. Jean wrote:

    A maid! Totally a maid!!!

    Monday, November 2, 2009 at 11:25 am | Permalink
  8. Trance wrote:

    Oh, God, Not THAT QUESTION. And see, Angi agrees with me. SEE??

    Monday, November 2, 2009 at 12:10 pm | Permalink
  9. Susan Grace wrote:

    Oh Weet, you write for me! I thought you knew that. I would have a maid that cleans, cleans, cleans. I love a sparkly clean house but I’m way to lazy to get it done.

    Monday, November 2, 2009 at 2:47 pm | Permalink
  10. heather wrote:

    A maid but if the butler is in charge of finding things I have misplaced, then a butler! Especially if the butler butlers for the cat who lost cat flap door privileges after a live punctured and angry rat was introduced to the interior of the house.

    Monday, November 2, 2009 at 7:45 pm | Permalink
  11. Alice wrote:

    A chef/cook. Totally. Were I restricted to the above choices, I’d want a maid who did the dishes s/he created while cooking for me. Then it’s totally a part of the job description!

    I don’t really care about cleanliness, though it’d be nice, and I don’t mind driving (though my answer might change once kids are in the picture). I can’t imagine what a butler would do with my lack of fancy wardrobe and guests, but I HATE cooking. My no-wheat, no-corn, nearly-no soy vegetarian diet is a pain in the ASS, and someone to take on the cooking part of things? Heaven.

    Monday, November 2, 2009 at 9:08 pm | Permalink
  12. Erica wrote:

    A maid. No question. There are three adults, a child, 4 dogs and a cat living in my house right now. The pet hair alone is more than I can keep up with, not to mention all the rest of the messies.

    Also: Card exchange! Yay!

    Monday, November 2, 2009 at 9:24 pm | Permalink
  13. Editrix wrote:

    Definitely a maid. My house being messy and running out of stuff like milk and having to have some semblance of dinner available — the things a maid would do are the biggest sources of stress outside my job.

    Tuesday, November 3, 2009 at 8:24 am | Permalink
  14. I believe I would have a cook. I do like to cook, but in the busy hustle and bustle I forget meals. I substitute meals for crap I can grab and or make quickly and that normally equates with unhealthy. So I think I would like a personal nutritionist/cook.

    Tuesday, November 3, 2009 at 12:34 pm | Permalink
  15. JennB33 wrote:

    A maid, for all the reasons previously listed. I work a full-time job, have a 2 hour commute, 2 small kids, 2 cats, a big, hairy dog, and a delightful husband who is completely unable to multi-task. And I help him run his business. Can I also get a gardener? If I could have all the chores around the house done, I would be a much happier woman.

    Tuesday, November 3, 2009 at 3:13 pm | Permalink
  16. JennB33 wrote:

    And, I would treat him or her with respect and kindness. I’m listening to “The Help” right now during my commute and it’s great but I just can’t believe how people treated their staff… The kids would stay in daycare, I would do most of the cooking, I just need someone to be tidying up the house every day and doing the to-the-corners cleaning.

    Tuesday, November 3, 2009 at 3:15 pm | Permalink
  17. maddy wrote:

    A maid, without a doubt. I love to drive, I already have a butler (I refer to him as my husband most of the time. If he were paid staff he’d probably be fired, because he’s a pretty lousy butler, but he’s pretty awesome at the non-butlering um… responsibilities, so I will definitely keep him around.) A maid? I need a maid. Ideally, she’d be completely OCD about dirt. And she’d love animals. She could even be a french maid with a french accent, dressed in a french maid uniform so the butler would have some cute eye-candy (to look at, but not indulge in!)

    Wednesday, November 4, 2009 at 12:36 pm | Permalink
  18. I want all of them. ALL, I tell you, ALL!! Okay, a maid. One armed with many cleaning implements.

    Wednesday, November 4, 2009 at 3:04 pm | Permalink
  19. Allison wrote:

    100% a maid; and preferably one who also had ‘lady’s maid’ talents and could make my hair look great on special occasions. And I choose maid because both me & hubby have work all week and it ends up that on our days off, all we do is catch up on cleaning and laundry. That’s not a fun way to use a day off!!!

    Friday, November 6, 2009 at 11:20 am | Permalink

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