I have to come up with an ad for Diaryland and it’s totally stressing me out. Performance anxiety. Eeesh.
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Last night someone accessed this diary by searching “Aidian Quinn” on Google. It’s disturbing to me that when you break down this diary into the base components, it’s all about weird pop culture references and whining and pseudonyms.
Everything that makes us feel unique is nothing but a confligeration of pop references and idiosyncracies. That which makes us unique is the same thing that makes us just like everyone else.
That having been said, I’m rather sorry that I do not have naked pictures of Aidian Quinn or Brad Pitt or even Britney Spears, because that is undoubtedly what the Google searchers are looking for.
barcode and unclebob have begun injecting their diaries with Google catch phrases to garner hits from horny net geeks.
Here’s trying that (you’ve been warned… if you have sensitive eyes, skip below!)
bbw naked pictures free big tits boobs breast ta-ta’s crotchless panties bondage BDSM submissive whips fetish penis cock dick pee-pee semen cum seminal fluid jizz hot nude babes vixens redhead curvy 46DDD garter belt stocking corset support-hose master suck lick chew nibble nipple aerola colon anus anal rim hole foot toes porn hinder spank ouch
Phew. I have years of parochial school guilt welling to the surface after that whole thing.
Results will be posted in future diary entries!
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Party planning continues for the 30th Birthday Bonanza Spectacular’. After sending out invitations that clearly state “adult fun: drinking, volleyball, etc”, I receive an email asking if they can bring their children. Um. Yeah, most two-year-olds generally do a lot of hard liquor drinkin’. Cigars and snuff will be available at a special kid’s table along with pornographic coloring books.
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Last night, our anniversary was very quiet and nice, punctuated by going to bed early and going straight to sleep. We’re a 67 years old married couple named Arlene and Norm, people. Told you it was going to happen.
Esteban got me a very lovely gold rope chain necklace which was extremely beautiful and thoughtful. Who knew? I, on the other hand, got him a Cuisinart ice cream maker, which he hates. He said “I’m fat enough, thank you.” I do have to admit that it was only a desparation gift. You see, I purchased Black Adder’s full five season DVD from Amazon and then realized that it’s not going to be released until late June. Oh no, what should I do then? Desparation kicks in and I go for the oral gratification, which is so very much like me. Estebean knows this, which is why he paird my gold chain gift with a Reese’s Peanut Butter cup. Such a sweet guy. However, I did notice that the candy bar was “2 for $1”, which means he ate the other one. He didn’t deny it people. So don’t try to guilt me for the ice cream maker, ‘k?
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Scary thing. I just found out that my tailgating sister has the hots for Johnny Knoxville. That’s a first… us both thinking the same guy is worthy of the horizontal-mambo. You see, we weren’t like the wacky hijinx that are normally seen on such fine sitcoms as “Give me a Break!” or the one with the Segall twins. We sisters never were interested in the same guy. I have no thing for Hyde on “That 70’s Show” like she does though. Man, I thought *I* had a thing for bad boys, but my little sis has me totally beat.
Bam Margera, however…. we both agree. Not cute.
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MWAH!