I had a whole entry about the farmer’s market here in town and how I was going to go to it this morning but overslept, but then Internet Explorer ate it and it was gone. And that pisses me right the hell off.
It wasn’t that good anyway. Well, better than what you’re reading right now, but still not that good.
The results of the poll showed that (at the time of posting) there’s really no accurate way of measuring why you’re here. The two most picked reasons were “Uncle Bob Sent Me” and “Just ‘Cause Damnit!” with 13 votes a piece. The next most popular response was “Um, 42”, which was a reference to Douglas Adams and shows what a true geek I am, says Esteban. If you “got” that reference, Esteban says you’re a geek. Hey, don’t feel so bad, I REFERENCED it so that makes me a total geek. Also, I made a joke in Eloi’s guestbook in HTML about ceasing to be a dork… the very fact that I found that funny, Esteban postulates, makes me a complete geek. He wishes. He just doesn’t want to feel like the sole geek in Rancho Weetabix. He is frightened sometimes by my coolness and endeavors to take me down a peg. At least this is what I’m telling myself today. And if you visit Eloi’s guestbook, make sure to sign it, as that is only polite.
Anywhoo, the next most popular response was “For the Microwave Pork Rinds”, but if you look at it on the results poll, it looks like it’s saying “This is not the answer”. That’s because I made the mistake of getting my poll from the ballot creators down in Florida. Sure, it was cheap, but what the hell? So, if you thought you voted for “Microwave Pork Rinds” and found out that you voted for “This is not the Answer”, my apologies but official ballots are final and the officials feel that what you REALLY MEANT to vote for was “This is not the answer”. Sorry, Microwave Pork Rinds had zero votes. If you’re questioning this, I had my brother recount the ballots.
“Naked Pictures of Allyson Hannigan” is the number one Google search that hits this website. My diary now comes up as third if you search for “Naked Allyson Hannigan”, so I’m going for number one, baby! It looks like only one of you was here for those. If I ever run into any pictures of naked Willow action, I’ll certainly post a link.
Two of you were here to see if I was writing about you. We know that one of the voters was Scott and I’m assuming that the other voter was Mark, because I know those two boys read this here thang, but maybe not.
And only one vote for “poop”. Which is disturbing. Because that was MY vote when I tested the poll. And I love entries about poop. I think that there might be a Weetabix Diary Drinking Game in the making. If she makes a poop joke, take a drink. If she lusts after Russell Crowe, do a shot. If she talks about someone else’s boobs, drink a beer. If she talks about her own boobs, do three shots. If she writes “let me tell you”, take a slow long drink of beer.
It just occurred to me that I don’t know if Drinking Games are a universal thing, or only an Alcholic-Training thing inherent here in Wisconsin. Hmmmm. Oh well. I assure you that there is such a thing. The point being that you get very drunk playing these games. There’s no winner or loser, just people throwing up into their boyfriend’s laps and such.
But I’m still going to write about poop, even if I’m the only one who appreciates it.
Just ’cause, dammit!
Just had to edit this to add: after writing this entry I went back to the bedroom but Esteban was already awake and getting dressed. I laid back down and proceeded to ungulate and stretch and be somewhat “Sex Kitten”ish while we talked. He finished getting dressed and then proceeded to leave the room.
I said, “What this? I’m lying here, looking all luscious and you didn’t even touch my bootay?” Because he can’t really resist touching the bootay.
“You know,” Esteban said, in his voice which meant that he’d obviously been thinking about it the whole time, “You call me overly-sexed when I grope you and then I don’t touch you and you WANTED me to grope you. I like our arrangement. I’m confused all the time. I don’t know what to expect. Congratulations. You’ve completely left me clueless.” and thus walked out of the room, laughing.
Very very funny. Very funny that it seems so elementary and logical to me, yet he is completely befuddled. Note to guys: when your girl is undulating on the bed, wearing her cute pj’s which could pass for scant clothing, looking into your eyes and licking her lips, feel free to grope. When your chick is plucking her eyebrows, reaching for a can of beans at the grocery store, or talking on the phone to her grandmother, this would be the non-groping time. Class dismissed.
Have you seen these?
It’s not over until your brother counts the votes
Feral Girl raised by wolves desires Rouge Pulp lipstick and some hair gel
Nothing but a gimmick, baby, just a gimmick
Magic 8 Ball says: It is unclear
All I want is a room somewhere… wouldn’t it be luverly?
