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Category Archives: Diaryland

The other white meat

There is something about the phrase ‘I shit you not’ that automatically makes me like the person using it. I don’t know why. I think it’s the idea of shitting someone, the conspiratorial tone that there are shitters of the world, but we (WE!) are not shitters. And also the placement of the ‘not’ at […]

I’m already in

We are driving home from a late dinner in Appleton, a dinner of barbecued ribs with Joel and Cheri that was messy and saucy and everything a rib dinner should be, complete with discussions of beard washers in the men’s bathroom and ending with the sentence ‘That’ll do pig, that’ll do.’ We ate with our […]

Merf

Life has been weird these last few days in our house. Or maybe the weirdness is in my head. I don’t know. Something something. I made Esteban laugh and laugh the other night. He came home many hours after I had already succumbed to the siren call of my legal narcotic cough syrup, and joined […]

First degree spermicide

Ok, the commercial with all of the people standing out of it, doing the weird open door close door synchronized dance thing? For the GMC Envoy? Is the dorkiest thing ever. And also, I think they’re opening and closing the doors to the bridge for Fleetwood Mac’s Tusk. Some commercials take themselves way too seriously. […]

My sick day in Haiku

Nyquil oh NyquilCherry flavored drooling sleepNightmares and dry mouth This is not my houseThis is not my beautifulStubble ridden calf Phone rings across houseShould I get up and get it?Maybe it will stop Ricola drops andSnot jeweled tissue flowerAdorn the table Too much TRLMouth breathers are coolOooh, Viva La Bam! Cranberry grape juiceNorthland one hundred […]

Link went dead

empty for now… dude, you totally missed out.

Ice Age

I got one of the coolest compliments yesterday. I bumped into the always lovely Carissa in the cafeteria and told her how hot she looked. And she said ‘Well, not as hot as Saturday night.’ To which I said ‘Do tell!’ and she said ‘Sit down! I will!’ and then we made excited girly noises, […]

Kalute’shuha

I forgot to tell you about New Year’s eve. Everyone always asks about what your plans are for New Year’s Eve. In the past, we’ve spent the evening with friends in their homes and in ours but our favorite way of spending the evening is always alone, with a bowl of popcorn, our heads propped […]

Detritus

I was supposed to work today, but instead, celebrated the fact that my vacation and sick time have refreshed and took a vacation day. I had a plan, of course, I always have a plan. It was full of such good intentions, involving the laundry and hanging artwork in the kitchen and most importantly, tackling […]

Old Year’s Revolutions 2003

On New Year’s Eve, I traditionally do a retrospective entry and this year isn’t any different. If you want to see the last three years, they’re here and here and here. I ripped the carpeting out of my living room. I picked out flooring for my kitchen. I painted my pantry. And I bought myself […]

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