I really hate January. I’m severely glad that it’s almost over. I think I have seasonal affective disorder or whatever new age weirdness is the psychological vogue right now. I think I have some radical disorder caused by inhaling and eating white drywall dust. Or something. I didn’t leave the house yesterday. I sat around […]
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You know, as much as I sometimes kvetch about being a girl, it’s really fun sometimes. I was thinking that as I was wandering around my house this morning in my adorably cute pink flowered boxer shorts and white t-shirt. I have a wonderful soft curvy body. I like my hips. I like the way […]
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Well, I was supposed to have a half a day off today but two members of our six-person team decided to be sick today. I hate them now. I went to the new non-Barnes & Noble Starbucks near my house on the way to work this morning. Now, let’s get one thing clear right now. […]
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Thursday, January 24, 2002
This is my favorite poem. Of. All. Time. It should come as no surprise to you. PoopBy Gerald Locklin my daughter, blake, is in kindgergarten. they are teaching her to be a docile citizen and, incidentally to read. concurrently, like many of us, she has become a trifle anal compulsive. complications ensue. i ask her […]
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Wednesday, January 23, 2002
Weetabix’s Uterus: Grrrrrrr! I hate the world!!! Weetabix: Stop it or I’ll take another Advil. Weetabix’s Uterus: By the way, did you see how the real Jack and Jennifer are back on Days of Our Lives? See? I told you that you should quit your job and stay home and watch soap operas and clean […]
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Tuesday, January 22, 2002
Ladies and Gentleman, my uterus has taken over. It has complete control of my body. Make no sudden movements or it will cut you, man, it will pop a cap in your ass. Or cramp up. Which is way worse, let me tell you. I’m all hormonal. I predicted this last week when I was […]
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“Look at how ‘It’s a wonderful life’ it is!” Belle commenting upon the largish snowflakes falling on Saturday afternoon, before I left for Milwaukee, which is originally Algonquin for “the good land”.* *I learned that from watching Wayne’s World. Party on. So this weekend. This is going to be a long entry. I’m warning you […]
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I had to go to a client’s office again this morning, the orifice of all that is Disney. It’s like Michael Eisner himself threw up all over her desk. At 8:00 in the morning, I swear those idiotic apes from Jungle Book stare into your soul and threaten eternal damnation. They ritualistically chant and stare […]
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Thursday, January 17, 2002
tell” I had to give an overview of our software package at a client today. I got along well with the girl I was training, but instinctively I felt bad for her. Her desk was festooned with Disney paraphernalia. Dopey dispensed her tape. Grumpy gave out staples. A billion dollar mouse stared out from her […]
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Wednesday, January 16, 2002
I’m having intense writer’s block this week. I have absolutely nothing to write about so I thought I’d just start an entry with no clue as to where it is going. I’m a little hungry. I’m waiting for the oven to heat up and then I will put in a Tombstone Thin Crust Pepperoni pizza. […]
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