Will taking amoxicillin get rid of my clematis?

Yesterday, I was bored, bored, bored. Esteban and I decided to go to Appleton as they are apparently the only city civilized enough to have a Barnes and Noble within 80 miles of here. Well, Green Bay has only just reached that level of civility as a B&N is rising out of the dust across from our mall, but it doesn’t yet have important things, like a roof. Thus Appleton it was.

They’d better watch out when they finish that Barnes & Noble here. I may spend entire weeks sitting in an over-stuffed chair, drinking Blackberry & Sage iced tea, illegally reading many periodicals and expensive photography books. In fact, I would be able to actually live at Barnes & Noble if they sold lip protection. They have everything else that I need to survive other than Blistex. I prefer the Ultimate Moisture stuff in the blue tube. Can’t live without that.

So I made a deal with Esteban, as I was starving. We could go to Appleton, but we’d have to go to lunch at my current favorite restaurant, The Machine Shed. It’s this farm-themed restaurant. Instead of soup and salad before your meal, you get cottage cheese and coleslaw and banana bread. There are big jugs of ice water on every table and little Mason jars to drink from. And all the wait staff wear overalls and John Deere hats. But that’s not why I go: I go because I’ve yet to have a bad meal there. Their mashed potatoes are the best thing known to man. God, I could go for some more right now. But Esteban has decided that he doesn’t like that place. He actually doesn’t like going anywhere that he didn’t think of first. He’s been grumpy about eating in Appleton ever since Lonestar closed. That place gave you peanuts that you’d eat and throw the shells on the floor which is very appealing to me. The idea of messing up someone else’s place’ I love that. But then they stopped that because they got sued or some shit. And they also wrapped up their leftovers in tinfoil and shaped it to look like a steer’s head. I always made sure that both Esteban and I had leftovers, just to get the little silver packages which looked like cows. Then I’d mock little discussions between them. Moo. Mooo Mooo. Moooooooo. Trust me. It was a riot. But now they’re gone, so I am settling for drinking out of Mason jars. It’s not as fun, but oh well.

This is not to say that if you invite me over to your house, I will willy-nilly throw my food on the floor. Don’t get the wrong impression. But I do so love it.

We ate lunch there and then had a big book binge at Barnes & Noble. Then I talked Esteban into letting me shop at The Avenue, which he was fine with, since he had oodles of books to read. I picked up another set of jammies which look like clothes, as well as a clearanced shirt and shorts. Vg.

Then back home, where I put on my new jammies and spent the rest of the day wearing them. And got very bored. The allure of spending most of the day in your jammies wears off rather quickly. And I didn’t feel like reading. I felt like being pandered to. So I did my Poetica-Collab assignment and also wrote another poem online. Wow. That was the most poetry writing in one day I’ve done since college. I guess I should get bored more often.

I was so bored, I actually watched ‘Saturday Night Live&AO8AvwC9AO8AvwC9- how sad is that?

Our clematis bloomed on our porch. I don’t often talk about my clematis, because somewhere along the line, I got the word ‘clematis’ confused with ‘clamydia’ and now whenever I think of it, the word ‘clamydia’ pops into my head first, so I’m always afraid of saying sentences like ‘Oh, you should take a look at my clamydia, it’s blooming right now!’ or ‘I’ll have to train my clamydia better’ right now it’s dangerous’ someone might trip over it. But it looks very nice from the road.’

I’ve been trying to make it grow up the porch, like a cool viney thing, but it’s only up to the second step and I’ve had it for three years. It bloomed but then something ate all the petals. Esteban went outside one night and said that there were tons of earwigs all over it, munching on the petals. I hope they get clamydia.