Ok, I didn’t like leaving that last depressing entry on my page and it’s slow as hell here at work today, therefore, another rare double-entry day.
Wow. That sounds like a very clinical porn term. ‘Double-entry’
Does anyone know what book that is from, because I think he made that up. I’ve read several Janowitz books and never encountered the Triple Entry girl. I think it was his segue to see if I liked weird sex.
No comment on that. I don’t want more stalkers.
Maybe I do, though. I bet if I had a stalker, s/he would maybe mow our lawn or help pick up the garbage left by the high school kids. I’d bring him or her hot cocoa on those cold nights when they sit outside my bedroom window, hoping to glimpse a little of the Weetabix bare bodkin.
I stole this from UncleBob’s page. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. So I wasn’t a huge copy cat, I added two more categories to the end.
Silent Film: Mr. Hulot’s HolidayOk, this isn’t really silent, but I did a lot of reading because it’s mostly in French, and I seem to remember it as a silent film for whatever reason. This was the only film I watched in my college film class that I enjoyed. Or remembered.
Old-School Musical: White Christmas This is my utter favorite musical. Maybe because when it’s on, Esteban makes me unlimited steaming cups of Tom & Jerry’s (which is a hot rum egg noggy type holiday drink, in case you didn’t know) and hopes to get me drunk so we’ll have wild passionate Bing Crosby/Rosemary Clooney sex. What really happens is I walk around singing about ‘Counting my blessings instead of sheep’ and break into big scale dance numbers. But I love this movie. It’s awesome. If you’ve never seen it, you simply must. It’s all about how when times get tough, you get all of your artsy friends together and put on a show! You’ve gotta love that.
Shiny New Musical: The Commitments When times look bleak, you put on a show. See. It’s a whole theme. Plus, Colm Meany, in an unusual casting turn as ‘Funny Grumpy Irish Guy’. As opposed to his other roles as ‘Mean Irish Guy’ in ‘Far and Away’, or ‘Horny Irish Guy’ in ‘The Englishman Who Couldn’t Keep His Pants On In The Presence Of Hollywood Hookers’.
Melodrama: The Godfather I want to be a Corleone. Only with my family, one of them would have shot me already.
Foreign Film: Life Is Beautiful Because it is.
Hitchcock Movie: Rear Window It has Jimmy Stewart in it. He doesn’t get his friends together and put on a show, though, which is a bit disappointing.
Movie About Yuppies: You’ve Got Mail Meg Ryan. Tom Hanks. Book Stores. ‘We have loved being a part of your life’. sniff You’re a nazi if you don’t think Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks belong together. When Harry Met Sally would be perfect if they ditched Billy Crystal and put in Tom Hanks. Castaway wouldn’t have been a bomb if Meg Ryan had been his blonde to go home to. We couldn’t buy the fact that Tom would be better off leaving the island. Come on, people, Wilson the volleyball had more warmth than Helen Hunt.
Documentary: The Most Haunted Place In America I’m a sucker for anything about ghosts or scary shit.
Disney Movie: The Little Mermaid Duh. I’d have a Chubby Ariel if I could find one.
Animated non-Disney Movie: Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer I like the Island of Misfit Toys, although they never explained what was wrong with the Dolly there. It always remains a mystery to me.
Science Fiction/Fantasy Movie: Star Wars Han Solo: the original master with a blaster. Plus, I can never watch that kookie scene in the bar too many times. I also like to try to spot Cliff Clavin on the Death Star.
Romantic Comedy: The Princess Bride Anyone want a peanut?
Bat-Shit Insane Movie: Pulp Fiction Not that insane. Not that Bat Shit. But twisted and perverse. I liked it. Plus, Uma Thurman looks like a human with black hair. When she’s got blonde hair, she looks like some kind of fetal albino calf woman with big old cow eyes. Plus, I’d totally order a $5 shake and Esteban would freak out about it. Then I’d tell him he was a square.
’80s Movie: The Goonies Chester Copperpot. The times got tough, so they all got together and went searching for gold. If it had Corey Haim in it, I would have used this for the ‘Coreys’ category and then I would have had Grease 2 as my favorite 80’s movie, because for a long time, I had a big crush on Lewis DiMucci and I wanted to do it for my country, the red white and the blue.
Pretentious Film Student Movie: Clerks It’s an independent movie. And I like it. It talks about blow jobs a lot.
Dumb, Dumb Movie: Anything with Adam Sandler Except The Wedding Singer which was very funny.
Teen Movie: Bring It On Oh yeah. Plus, the times got tough, so they all got together and put on a cheerleading routine.
Movie with The Coreys: The Lost Boys It’s the only one I’ve ever seen, actually. No, wait, was Corey Haim in ‘License to Drive’? Doesn’t matter, that movie sucked. The Lost Boys was great for several reasons. Kiefer Sutherland. Kiefer Sutherland. Kiefer Sutherland. Oh, and it has vampires. And Kiefer Sutherland.
Horror Movie: Fright Night Christopher Sarandon. Looking sexy. Yum.
Depressing-as-all-Hell Movie: The English Patient I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. Esteban actually thought that someone in our family had died.
Best use of On Screen Lists: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.
Worst Choice of Double Feature: Schindler’s List and Reservoir Dogs This was a big mistake. We were clueless. We figured that after watching Schindler’s List, we’d need something to laugh at, so we planned
