Saturday, December 14, 2002
Weetabix’s Uterus: Is this the place where I sign up for a reassignment? Don’t give me a look like that. Listen, I’ve tried to be understanding. I’ve tried to be patient. I’ve been sitting back for 31.5 years, envisioning all the uterine glory that was to come. I mean, you should have heard the pep […]
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Thursday, December 12, 2002
I’ve become aware of a new disturbing trend. The percentage of readers who actually know me in the real world is growing. At first, only my sister Mo and my friend Markus read this diary. Then Esteban told his friends about it and Joel read something like 150 entries in one sitting. And then everyone […]
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Tuesday, December 10, 2002
I think I’m getting sick. I think it’s because I started to take vitamins a few months ago and then forgot for three days but because my body got so accustomed to the extra Clubhouse Pow!! it forgot how to fend for itself. I had some kind of prolonged episode today while on the phone […]
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I don’t want to write this entry. I know already that it’s going to be all HTMLy and annoying and it will likely give me a headache. Instead, so far, I’ve finished most of my holiday cards’ I’ve got all of the addresses written and most of them stuffed. I have a butt load of […]
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Thursday, December 5, 2002
In the past three days, I have started two entries, only to have my computer (yes, for those of you playing along on the home version of Life With Weetabix it is my NEW computer) strangely reboot itself or something when I leave it alone. Completely obliterating my unsaved Word document. I haven’t a clue. […]
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I went grocery shopping on Saturday with Esteban… a thing that only happens twice a year because his primary goal once we walk inside the store is TO GET OUT OF THE STORE. He makes me crazy. He insists upon walking every square inch of the store, down weird aisles, because “You never know…”. I […]
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I got a good look at my butt in the mirror last night. I had worn a hoodie sweatshirt all day but because I was at home and Esteban has the heat cranked to Old People Temperature, as he has been feeling under the weather, I removed said hoodie and walked around in my stretch […]
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Friday, November 29, 2002
As Thanksgivings go, today was pretty unspectacular. When I was a kid, Thanksgiving always smacked of cold bare morning feet and needing to be quiet in the morning because my mother and her boyfriend (I always hate that term’ ‘boyfriend’ when referring to someone in their thirties or forties. As thought they were going steady. […]
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Tuesday, November 26, 2002
Something is up with my breasts. I wanted to say “Something strange is afoot with my breasts” but the images there–the breasts, the feet–it was simply all too much for even me. Anywhoo, they seem to have changed. They’re a little bit… morphed or something. Something science fiction. Someone Ray Bradburied my breasts. At first […]
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Monday, November 25, 2002
Esteban and I went out to dinner on Friday night. After some aimless driving, during which Esteban regaled me with analogies of how hungry he was and what exactly he would eat at that very moment if it were available to him, he suddenly remembered that he hadn’t yet taken me to the new Japanese […]
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